The London church of St Mary Axe
Famous for one little-unknown fact
It once held the bloodied battleaxe
Used without mercy to poleaxe
Eleven thousand British virgins
Meriadoc, fabled Celtic commander
All conquering, just like the great Alexander
Friend to Maximus, hopeful Roman emperor
Now he needs to cajole and pander
To eleven thousand British virgins
Recreating his beloved British homeland
On France’s western coastal land
Meriadoc’s Armorica, forged by many a manly hand
Desperate to utilise their engorged glands,
On eleven thousand British virgins
Meriadoc called upon his future wife
Sail to him, save him from this manmade strife
Many of his followers in the prime of their lives
Need more to hold than goodly wives.
They need eleven thousand British virgins
Ursula, initially pilgrimaged to Rome
Her excited virgins mutually chaperoned.
Hoping Pope Siricius under his Vatican dome
Would bless and protect the new home
Of eleven thousand British virgins
Alas, the channel winds had fiercely blown
Captured, mistreated, they had not known
how they found themselves in old Cologne.
Merciless barbaric Huns with erotic overtones,
Desired the eleven thousand British virgins.
‘No!’ said the girls ‘That's the one thing we dread’
‘We’re saved for Armoricans,’ they all said
‘We won’t allow you to confiscate our maidenheads’
So the Huns beheaded everyone. The streets ran red,
With the blood of eleven thousand British Virgins.
They singled Ursula as the leader of this quest
Undebased, they led her away, without protest
she wept to God for all her friends, now at rest,
Then shot her fatally between her parian-like breasts
So died eleven thousand and one British virgins.
……………………………………………………………….
Llangwyryfon is a small village in Wales
The name translates as the church of the Virgins
And is the only church dedicated to St Ursula
Christopher Columbus named the Virgin Isles
When he sailed past them on St Ursula’s feast day
of October 21st 1493
On October 21st 1520, Ferdinand Magellan named
The Cape of Virgins on the very tip of South America
After St Ursula and the virgins
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